‘Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.’ This is a phrase we have been told from generations before us – the same generations that told women that they needed to wear makeup, become an hourglass figure and dress to impress. When you think about it, beauty was never allowed to be in the eye of the beholder.
But let’s not talk about politics and sociology today.
Instead, let’s take this moment of global rest in our homes (you’d better be at home), to learn to love our looks. For me, this is something that I have surprisingly learnt during these many weeks of lockdown. Before this shitshow, I would wear makeup every single day, no matter if I was going out with friends (pfft, you have friends?), or lounging at home. Putting on my makeup was a morning ritual because I thought I needed it. I have suffered with acne for most of my teenage and adult years, and have been taking medication for it for the past couple of years. When I looked at other women my age and their perfect skin, it made me feel unattractive.
Not only did I wear makeup everyday, but I would also spend a good chunk of the day feeling ashamed of my imperfect body. To be honest I don’t remember not having a lil muffin top, and obviously, no one in the magazines has one of them; especially when being a size 12 is considered ‘plus-size’ (some of us are just tall, okay).
However, when this lockdown began, and I started spending more time at home, I unknowingly started a beauty revolution. I wore less makeup each day, until one day, I went barefaced. If you know me personally, then you’ll know that going a whole day without even concealer on, was a major step. At the same time, my significant other and I became accountability buddies, as we tried to become healthier. Plus, I wore less form-fitting clothes and dressed for comfort (no one at home to impress but me).
A few weeks later, and my self-confidence is at an all time high. I think I am just as beautiful without makeup as I am with (plus, my acne got significantly better!). I will still wear makeup for work and shopping outings (for essentials obvs), but I will let my skin breathe more at home. Do I still have a muffin top? Hell yes, and I love her. I am happy with my body, it’s not model standard, but I don’t need it to be. I’ve stopped weighing myself every week and falling into the trap of shame, instead, I’ll weigh myself once a month to check that I’m still healthy.
My health is more important than my beauty, and my beauty comes from my health. I am beautiful, I am the beholder.
Stay safe, love yourself and I’ll see you next time.
Featured Image Credit 📷: Kina Choi