Thank Me, Hater

Originally when I planned this post, my inspiration came from a blog post I read about minimalism. In that post (and no, I’m not going to link it here), the vitriol from this “minimalist” was mind-blowing. I’ll discuss this further in this post, but I want to express that this post is not just about dealing with confrontation, but also, letting go of negative people.

Back to the blog post I read…

I have realised that as a blogger, the best way for me to improve is by reading other people’s blogs. Think about it, it would be absurd for a science-fiction author to produce a novel about space, without ever reading any prior books about space. I decided to search for some tags on WordPress, and I found the whole experience insightful. Yet, nothing would be more educational, than the minimalism blog I read (jee wizz). Now, the message I believe this author was trying to convey was one about being a practical minimalist, and not an Instagram minimalist. I have experienced this when grazing through social media for an inspirational minimalist feed, only to come face-to-face with an account about minimalist aesthetics. However, the aggression in this author’s words was not useful. Berating the reader into a state of shame, and anxiety, does neither motivate them to discover the benefits of minimalism, or encourage them to feel comfortable for not being minimalist.

Since being on the road to recovery, I have found that I am less receptive to negativity. Whereas before, I would wallow in the upset that others put to me, now, I am confident enough to accept what I cannot change and let those people slide right out of my brain (bye, bitch). Instead of feeling the hate from this author, I pitied them, for their anger is a transcript of the suffering in their life (and I will not shame them for that).

This brings me nicely onto my latest experience of negativity…the misogynist. Last time, I spoke about how my body positivity has been at an all time high and that I no longer treat makeup as a mask (if you missed this, here’s the link: Natural Beauty). Shortly after publishing that post, I received a heart-warming amount of support from friends and other bloggers (thank you!).

And then…there was the douchebag. I had one guy repost my content along with an incredibly misogynistic comment on why a woman should wear makeup for her man (they obviously didn’t read the whole “I am a lesbian” content I’ve got going on) and that men are the true paragons. I’m not going to harp on about it, because I wouldn’t want this guy to feel like he has won. If anything, his comment fired up even more support for my own, and other women’s body positivity.

Over on Instagram, I asked some of you what you do to overcome negativity and here are some responses:

• Kill them with kindness
• Spin some light on their hate
• Be compassionate

It takes nothing to be kind, but it can cost to be cruel.

Stay safe, be kind, and I’ll see you next time

Featured Image Credit 📷: Gwendal Cottin